Posted by Josh on July 14, 2008
1. Carmen Electra
2. Fergy (She’s basically Carmen Electra’s mini-me, except she likes to piss her pants and, without makeup, she looks like the Leprechaun from the Leprechaun movies)
3. Jessica Simpson
4. Jessica Biel (Maybe not “ugly” but i never saw what the big deal with her was)
5. Tila Tequila
6. Scarlett Johansson (Not sure if that’s spelled right, nor do I care)
7. Megan Fox
8. Gwen Stefani (But at least she takes cute asian girls with her where ever she goes)
(BTW, don’t confuse this list as me coming out of the closet.)
Posted in Gallimaufry, Laconic | Tagged: Carmen Electra, Fergy, Gwen Stefani, Jessica Biel, Jessica Simpson, Megan Fox, Scarlett Johansson, Tila Tequila | 1 Comment »
Posted by Josh on July 7, 2008
Here’s a conversation I had with my mother the other day. To prove that “Positive Reinforcement” is not in her vocabulary.
Me: You know these jeans I’m wearing?
Mom: Yeah?
Me: Two months ago they were too small to fit, now they do.
*pause*
Now… this is were a normal, relatively polite person would say something like “Oh, you must’ve lost weight then.” But not my mom…
*unpause*
Mom: Yeah, that’s probably because they don’t get dried in the dryer anymore, just hung out to dry, that’s probably why they fit ya now.
Posted in Laconic, Termagant | Tagged: Fat, jeans, mom, mother, sadness | Leave a Comment »
Posted by Josh on May 18, 2008
Oh… and in related news: I had a job… for about a month and a half… more on that at 11
Posted in Laconic | Leave a Comment »
